Is female friendship a myth: a sad personal experience

I often hear stories about strong female friendships that last for decades. I used to believe in them myself. I thought I was lucky to have such a friend. Unfortunately, life has shown me that I was mistaken.

My friendship with Olya began not even in school, but in kindergarten. We slept in adjacent beds, played with dolls, and fought with naughty boys together. In school, we sat at the same desk. We went hiking with classmates together and skipped tests together.

After school, we moved to different cities. I entered university to study economics, while Olya went to medical school. But we continued to stay in touch, talking daily on the phone, sharing our secrets, and consulting about anything. Whenever possible, we would visit each other.

Then adult life began: work, family. Olya was the first to get married and have a daughter. We then celebrated my wedding, and a couple of years later, the birth of my son. We visited each other with our families, went shopping together, and discussed family and work issues.

Over the years, Olya became more sharp-tempered and conflict-prone. I paid little attention to it. What can you do? That's just her character. She could snap for no reason. She could sulk for weeks. And then reappear as if nothing had happened.

It was her husband and child who suffered more from this sharpness. Olya's relationship with her daughter has always been complicated. The daughter grew up stubborn and willful. Essentially, just like her mother was in childhood. But when I reminded Olya of this, she would fly into a rage. Apparently, she wanted to see her child as obedient and easygoing.

One day, we decided to organize a nature outing with the kids. We came up with an interesting route that included a national park and a unique excursion on a narrow-gauge railway on a rail bike. We booked a charming mansion on the shore of a huge beautiful lake for the night. Both we and the kids were thrilled.

The day was very eventful, and we were all tired. A barbecue was planned for the evening, but Olya had no strength to grill it. So, I took care of the barbecue with my son. Her teenage daughter locked herself in the mansion's bedroom and couldn't be pried away from her phone. Only late in the evening did Olya manage to drag her out for a walk to the lake and a photo session by the water. However, they constantly argued about everything.

In the morning, I woke up earlier than everyone and started preparing breakfast. Two little house dogs were running around the mansion—they accompanied us everywhere and waited by the doors. I fed them the leftover porridge and gave them the tougher pieces of barbecue.

Olya saw this, having gotten up by that time and already having argued with her daughter again. Seeing that I was feeding the dogs, she snapped! She started yelling that I was wasting food and why I was feeding them. And that she would rather finish the barbecue herself than give it to some dogs.

The barbecue was not all gone—I had left softer pieces in the fridge for us. But, as I understand now, it wasn't really about the barbecue. Olya was irritated because of her fight with her daughter and took out her anger on me. The entire ride back, she deliberately ignored me. She was silent, answered questions with evident dissatisfaction, and with reluctance. Apparently, she was used to communicating this way with her husband.

By the way, she ate the barbecue on the way back. And right in motion, she threw pieces out of the car that she couldn't chew.

At the train station, we said goodbye, and I returned home with my son. That evening, I saw that Olya had posted photos from the trip on social media. And everywhere she wrote about what a wonderful holiday we had.

But I don't consider this holiday wonderful. And since then, I haven't communicated with Olya. I consider posting such photos with complimentary captions to be sheer hypocrisy.

What do you think about this? Should I have swallowed this outburst of anger directed at me from my friend? What would you have done in my place? Have you had similar situations?